The contract for next year at NJU is signed and in the mail. I wish I could feign gratitude or happiness, but to be honest, I’m just really depressed about the whole thing. The Spouse doesn’t want me to give up my dreams and supports me in conducting another search next year, but I’m just done. It seems pointless to put me (and him) through this yet another year. My employment prospects seem to have peaked, and subsequent searches do not seem to be a good way to spend (waste?) my time.
I realize this isn’t completely over, but it may as well be. It’s hard to see potential or to feel hope when things have gone the way that they have. At least I’ll have income next year as I figure out what my life will look like for the foreseeable future.