Somehow, I had a bunch of double-posts. Ugh. To add insult to injury, I had some old posts come back as if they were recently published posts. Sorry to have made your feeds crazy!
After my eye appointment today (which confirmed my suspicions that my right eye had lost some vision), I indulged in some very restrained retail therapy. Restrained indulgence, what a concept! I first got my eyebrows threaded, and they look awesome! See? (Please excuse the fact that my hair is a disaster and my skin is shiny.)
Then, I went shopping for some everyday clothes. Too much of my clothing of late is work-centric, which is boring for going out and non-work days. I bought a couple of pieces that will be nice to have for going out to dinner, meeting with friends, etc. I finally got some dark rinse jeans and a cute black cardigan (cropped and fitted, yay)! I also got a couple of other shirts that will be nice to have when the weather warms up. Since I haven’t really bought any new clothes in a long while, it’s nice to get some new stuff in my wardrobe rotation.
Tonight a friend asked me if I was doing any new research. To be honest, I can’t find the drive, given that I may not have a t-t job next year. I’ve decided that if I don’t get an academic job for next year that I’m putting my research to rest. I’ll give my advisor all of my data and stuff so that he can tinker with it if he wants, but I’m not going to give my time to my research when realistically, it will go nowhere. Maybe that’s a mistake, but at a certain point, I can’t keep funding out-of-pocket conference trips, resubmitting articles, and drafting conference paper proposals just because. I tell myself that if my work really mattered, I’d have a job by now. Obviously it won’t be a huge loss, so I can live with that decision.
On the job-related front, I have a phone interview on Monday. To be honest, I’m not as excited as I’ve been for the last few. Granted, a lot of it has to do with the type of position (1-yr VAP at a place I really don’t want to live). Some of it can be attributed to the fact that I am just completely burned out with this whole job search process. Some days, I don’t even care if I get a job. I just want to be free of all of this. When I hear people complain about work, I just want to shake them and say, “Trust me, it could be worse!” At least they know what they’ll be doing for the foreseeable future.
If I don’t have a job lined up for next academic year, I’m drawing the line in the sand and saying, “¡no más!”
Life will go on. It has to.